The exercise:
Kat is coming home this afternoon and she'll be staying for the week. This will be the longest we've been together since... June? I know that's not incredibly long, but it feels like forever at this point.
Anyway, today's prompt is: anticipation.
Mine:
My thoughts won't stay in single file,
My lips won't put away their smile,
My eyes keep turning to the road -
I've entered Waiting For You mode.
The sky is a little more blue,
The birds sing a little more true,
The air's a little more alive -
I can't wait for you to arrive.
6 comments:
I hope Kat reads this blog of yours so she can see how much you love her ;-)
I like your poem a lot, though the change in metre of the second verse threw me at first. I'm in two minds as to whether I think it's a neat little device, or if it's a touch confusing with only two verses. Hmmmm.
Anticipation
Breath caught in throat,
Chest tight,
Heart pounding,
Come tonight?
Candles burning,
Food cooling,
Wine abandoned,
Who's fooling?
Rat-a-tat-tat,
Someone knocking,
Can it be?
Door unlocking
Food forgotten,
Feeling joyous,
Anticipation's
Made glorious.
Y'know, had you not written a follow up so recently, I could've used this as a perfect "subtle" prod. But you have, and I won't. Don't want you to think you're "character building"'s gone to waste, now...
- - - - -
I sit expectantly, as if I'm waiting for a bus.
I keep checking the time, as if that'll make the time go faster.
I look up and down the street, through the crowds of people, as if that'll make you appear.
I want to talk to you again...
...as if that'll replace finally meeting you.
Greg - I reckon she's got a pretty good idea :) She reads it anyway though.
I vote neat little device!
I really like this stanza:
"Candles burning,
Food cooling,
Wine abandoned,
Who's fooling?"
g2 - yeah, I'm clever like that :P
I really like your ending, very poignant. And, dare I say, a touch romantic?
Thankful that there is more than one definition to the word "romantic," I'll assume you mean either "having no basis in fact," or "impractical in conception or plan." With that in mind, I'd say "yes, perhaps it's a touch romantic."
(However, there's some tiny part of my mind that's asking "why do I get the feeling those aren't the definitions he's after?")
*smirks*
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