The exercise:
Your prompt today: cheap.
Happy Father's Day!
Kat and I had our Goodbye Vancouver party this afternoon/evening at Spanish Bank and it was a great time. I may have had a little too much to drink. But that didn't stop this great picture of us being taken:
To say that I am pleased that I don't have to go to work tomorrow would be an understatement of the most serious degree.
Mine:
"I am not, nor have I ever been, a cheap drunk!" Jason proclaimed at the top of his lungs, waving his empty shot glass around like an orchestra conductor with a baton.
"Is that right?" I asked with as open an expression as I could muster. I did my best not to think about the fact that he was only on his second drink of the evening.
"That is absolutely, astoundingly, exactly correct!" he replied with a solemn nod. "I am simply an efficient drunk."
"That's a very good point," I said, holding out a hand in his direction. "Now let me help you get down from that table and out of that tutu before the librarian gets back from the bathroom."
That's a great picture of you both! Spanish Bank looks pretty nice (having checked out the Wikipedia link too). I hadn't realised you were leaving Vancouver quite so quickly for Osyoos, but I guess it's best to keep up the momentum so you don't start having ideas about things that seem even better to do.
ReplyDeleteAnd enjoy your day off (of packing) ;-)
I agree with Jason: efficient drunkness is much more expedient than cheap drunkness. Now, which are you again...?
Cheap
Chasing angels by running barefoot,
Having your mother provide your haircut,
Eating out at friends' every day,
Always leaving before it's your turn to pay,
Please tell me you can read what you are!
"Frugal? Cheap? Which is he?" my mother muttered under her breath. She glared at me. I pulled away and glared back. Like I can control my boyfriend's, I mean fiance's, spending habits.
ReplyDeleteJust because he brought my mother flowers he'd rescued from a Dumpster, she was all upset. I rolled my eyes.
"You just want a good provider, Maria. Not some cheapskate telling you you paid too much for milk again. I worry about you, that's all." She smiled gently at me.
Marc- Sharing a bit of personal history? If so, I'd pay to see that.
ReplyDeleteGreg- Fun little piece. So glad I got rid of this friend a while ago.
Morganna- That sounds similar to one of my brother-in-laws. Too bad he is no match for my sister who just rolls her eyes and buys a second gallon of milk.
My story? Far from my favorite.
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They squared off, circling one another, anger and distrust heating the space between them. "Who the hell do you think you are?" George grunted at his competitor. "You think you can walk into this place and put your hands on anyone you want? That doesn't fly with me pal!"
His pal threw a left hook, missing George by inches, stumbling slightly over his own feet. George stepped back, but didn't throw a punch. He was angry, but not stupid. He knew his moment would come. "And now your throwing punches? That is not allowed in my establishment. I suggest you leave now before you end up hurting yourself or someone else."
A crowd had gathered giving a narrow berth for the men to weave between. "The only person who's going to get hurt is you," the pal responded before lunging forward. Alcohol played havoc with his coordination and he nearly tripped again, catching his rib on the side of the table. George saw him wince in pain as he regained his balance and height. Slowly, George began walking backwards, parting the crowd like the Red Sea.
The man came after him again, his slurred war anthem blaring "F*** you!" He swung his right fist at George's face. Checking to see the path had cleared and the door was still open, George used the man's momentum to send him sailing into the street. The street police would be near. They always were and they would take care of this situation. A cheap shot some would say, but one that had served him well for years.
George turned his back, his bouncers standing guard at the door. The police came running, alerted by the man's loud protest. A smile spread across his face as he announced half price beers for the next five minutes.
Greg - I am most definitely an efficient drunk.
ReplyDeleteThe line about 'eating out' at friend's was particularly spot on :)
Morganna - that's a great little vignette for this prompt. Nicely handled.
Heather - other than declaring on the odd occasion that I'm not a cheap drunk, I'm efficient, that had nothing to do with me :D
'... his slurred war anthem blaring...' jumps out as another excellent line. I'd say you're on a roll now!