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Tuesday November 8th, 2011

The exercise:

Two haiku about: early morning.

Spent the day working on writing projects and chopping wood. Sounds like a good winter day to me. Too bad it's still fall, for crying out loud.

Mine:

The purest silence,
the sun's first tentative touch;
I watch and wonder.

*     *     *

I'm sure it's quite nice
and all that, but don't ask me -
I slept right through it.
at

8 comments:

  1. Greg8 November 2011 at 23:43

    I like your second haiku best today, Marc :) I'll come by tomorrow and comment properly then; today's a bit too busy and I'm a bit too tired, sorry :(

    g

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous9 November 2011 at 01:19

    I'm no good at haiku but I really liked that one today marc.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Unknown9 November 2011 at 07:46

    beaut, love the style differences between the two, despite both being haiku. also: i read tentative as tentacle the first time through. def changed the mood, some. note to self: sleep more.

    mine:

    Daylight flashes white
    but fades just as quick to black,
    lightning before dawn.

    ///

    Light stabs at my eyes,
    pokes me, prods me, incessant.
    Should have shut the blinds.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Greg9 November 2011 at 13:10

    Ok, still tired but it's nearly bedtime :) Let's see what we can do.

    Early morning
    Dress'd entire in black,
    It seems I misread your note
    As Early Mourning.

    --------
    The city is best
    When everyone else still sleeps,
    One early morning.

    @Jordan: I think I like your second haiku best; I've been there!

    @Writebite: I'm no good at haiku either, but Marc keeps making me try and improve every week :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous9 November 2011 at 19:12

    greg...ha! love your haiku, btw, i share the sentiment.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Marc9 November 2011 at 23:28

    Writebite - practice makes something something... ;)

    JorJack - thanks very much! And... I think I actually prefer it with tentacle in there :D

    Two great haiku, really loved the imagery in the first.

    Greg - get some sleep!

    Also, I agree with your second haiku as well.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous10 November 2011 at 07:41

    I love yours Jordan.
    **********************
    I will stay in bed
    And creep under the covers
    Until it warms up

    The phone is ringing
    I don't want to answer it
    I will stay in bed

    My dog is snoring
    Not ready to start the day
    Just like me I guess

    I should get up now
    And take a long hot shower
    Be presentable

    Alas, the sun shines
    Reminding me of new starts
    I begin again

    I will do my chores
    And be a good wife and mom
    I am blessed with love

    I have four daughters
    They are my life and my joy
    I have two great sons

    My husband is great
    Married for twenty five years
    I think I'll keep him

    I love to create
    I enjoy my studio
    I always find calm

    Paint, pastels, paper
    What will I create today
    Only my heart knows

    Again I will sleep
    At the end of a long day
    Under my warm wool blanket

    I will thank my God
    For my blessings in this life
    And priase his good works

    Just another day
    In the life of a housewife
    Nothing is better

    (Sorry it's so long, I just started and it kept going)

    I am determined to get back to writing. I even started a blog to keep track of my progress. I'm sl glad I found your website. Thanks again.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Marc10 November 2011 at 23:51

    Marissa - welcome! I'm glad you found the blog and I hope it proves useful.

    And absolutely no need to apologize for length - who am I to tell you when to stop, right? :D

    "I think I'll keep him" was definitely my favorite line :)

    ReplyDelete

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