The exercise:
Two haiku about: early morning.
Spent the day working on writing projects and chopping wood. Sounds like a good winter day to me. Too bad it's still fall, for crying out loud.
Mine:
The purest silence,
the sun's first tentative touch;
I watch and wonder.
* * *
I'm sure it's quite nice
and all that, but don't ask me -
I slept right through it.
I like your second haiku best today, Marc :) I'll come by tomorrow and comment properly then; today's a bit too busy and I'm a bit too tired, sorry :(
ReplyDeleteg
I'm no good at haiku but I really liked that one today marc.
ReplyDeletebeaut, love the style differences between the two, despite both being haiku. also: i read tentative as tentacle the first time through. def changed the mood, some. note to self: sleep more.
ReplyDeletemine:
Daylight flashes white
but fades just as quick to black,
lightning before dawn.
///
Light stabs at my eyes,
pokes me, prods me, incessant.
Should have shut the blinds.
Ok, still tired but it's nearly bedtime :) Let's see what we can do.
ReplyDeleteEarly morning
Dress'd entire in black,
It seems I misread your note
As Early Mourning.
--------
The city is best
When everyone else still sleeps,
One early morning.
@Jordan: I think I like your second haiku best; I've been there!
@Writebite: I'm no good at haiku either, but Marc keeps making me try and improve every week :)
greg...ha! love your haiku, btw, i share the sentiment.
ReplyDeleteWritebite - practice makes something something... ;)
ReplyDeleteJorJack - thanks very much! And... I think I actually prefer it with tentacle in there :D
Two great haiku, really loved the imagery in the first.
Greg - get some sleep!
Also, I agree with your second haiku as well.
I love yours Jordan.
ReplyDelete**********************
I will stay in bed
And creep under the covers
Until it warms up
The phone is ringing
I don't want to answer it
I will stay in bed
My dog is snoring
Not ready to start the day
Just like me I guess
I should get up now
And take a long hot shower
Be presentable
Alas, the sun shines
Reminding me of new starts
I begin again
I will do my chores
And be a good wife and mom
I am blessed with love
I have four daughters
They are my life and my joy
I have two great sons
My husband is great
Married for twenty five years
I think I'll keep him
I love to create
I enjoy my studio
I always find calm
Paint, pastels, paper
What will I create today
Only my heart knows
Again I will sleep
At the end of a long day
Under my warm wool blanket
I will thank my God
For my blessings in this life
And priase his good works
Just another day
In the life of a housewife
Nothing is better
(Sorry it's so long, I just started and it kept going)
I am determined to get back to writing. I even started a blog to keep track of my progress. I'm sl glad I found your website. Thanks again.
Marissa - welcome! I'm glad you found the blog and I hope it proves useful.
ReplyDeleteAnd absolutely no need to apologize for length - who am I to tell you when to stop, right? :D
"I think I'll keep him" was definitely my favorite line :)