The exercise:
Using only four lines of prose, give me the layout of a place.
Inspired by Greg's comment on yesterday's post, as I hadn't realized I'd yet to give a proper description of my place of winter work.
We went up to Penticton today to run a few errands, including stocking up on meat and doing a bit of shopping. Kat brought home three new sweaters and I bought my first pair of shoes in... a while.
Back to work tomorrow. And where exactly is that, you ask? Well...
Mine:
As you enter the two-storey building through the glass doors that separate the indoors from the small parking lot outside, you find yourself confronted by another set of doors directly in front of you. Pass through these and you will be in Kobau Lanes, the 8 lane bowling alley where I spend my Tuesday nights and some of my working hours.
If, instead, you turn to your right after escaping the cold, you will face a long, straight staircase that will take you to Vengeance Fitness and a floor filled with cardio and weight machines, as well as the usual assortment of free weights. I can be found here (at least) every Saturday, either behind the counter or cleaning the equipment... pretending not to think about writing prompts.
5 comments:
Long straight staircase? Definitely a surfboard then :) I have a much better idea of what the place looks like now, so thank-you. It's an excellent description (especially in just four lines of prose!)
Do you already have enough sweaters then? Or were new shoes a considerably more important item for you ;-)
The layout of the place
The sorceror did one of those things with his arms that made you wonder if his mother had been an octopus, and Uruk saw his surroundings dissolve away. After a moment hanging in thin grey mist new walls, ceiling and floor crystallised around him, and he landed on the floor with an ungentle thump.
So this was (probably) the basement of Castle deNieve, home of the Lich King, the Beholder Queen and their court of lice-ridden courtiers? He sighed, and decided he'd better figure out the layout of the place.
Greg - I'm basically always warm, so I need a very limited number of sweaters. I was, however, badly in need of shoes.
Hah, that's a great opening line. The rest is good as well, full of some very nice descriptions.
And once again you've left me wanting to know what happens next!
As you walk down the wooden pathway you will soon approach the big black door, turning the handle and pushing with your shoulder you enter a house with a cabin feel. From there you have two options, up the stairs into the bright and open area filled with hidden secrets and whispers, or down into the cold dark basement where happiness and joy emerge.
When you choose your path there are two more choices from there, up will lead you to a door that will immediately take you back to that wooden path. Going down, one will find themselves in one of the most interesting conversation about god knows what, the path is yours to choose.
This seems like an interesting house, definitely deserving of exploring a little further I think. I like the unexpectedness of the upstairs and the downstairs, though I'm a little disappointed that the second paragraph doesn't really develop that any further. Even so, it still does make me want to know more about this place, and especially that conversation!
Graeme - I think Greg said most of what I'd want to, but I'll go ahead and second his thoughts on the unexpected qualities of the upstairs and downstairs choice.
I'd usually expect the opposite, so your take added extra intrigue to the scene for me.
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