The exercise:
Write something that has to do with: the black market.
Max and I finally got around to putting a proper covering of sawdust on our garlic planting this afternoon. Now they should be nice and protected from the winter cold - and maybe even have some help with keeping the weeds down in the spring.
Got a call today asking if I could extend my 4 to 9 shift at the community centre tomorrow night up to 12 to 9. Always nice to get some extra hours. Hopefully all goes well there.
But, really, I'll be happy as long as I don't have to kick anybody out at the end of the night.
Mine:
Something you need? I know a guy. Match his price and it's yours.
Easy, right?
Got something you need taken off your hands? Name your number, I'll find a buyer.
This ain't complicated.
At least, it doesn't have to be. So don't go making it too, how shall I say... intricate. Delicate. Keep it simple, keep it straightforward. Don't clog up the channels. Goods come in, goods go out. Flow like a river, baby.
The cops don't need to get involved here. Ain't nobody getting hurt. Just a group of like-minded individuals getting what they want. No harm, no foul, right?
So why you gotta make my life difficult? Why you gotta mess things up for everybody? You think you're something special, is that it? That our rules don't apply to you? You've got a thing or two to learn, my friend. Hard lessons, without question.
Lucky for you, we got some real good teachers 'round here.
You sound like you've done this black market thing before ;-) I like how you start off persuasive and then move onto a slightly different kind of persuasion. It's not exactly subtle, but it is very nicely done, and I'm sure I wouldn't like to meet the teachers you have in mind. No sirree....
ReplyDeleteThe black market
"This is a test, right?" The henchman looked around, puzzlement putting a frown on their face. "Only... everything's actually black."
"Racist much?" said Ben. "That guy over there's just got a heavy suntan. I knew his mother."
"You dated his mother," said Bill after a quick glance. "Just after the mushroom girl."
"Chanterelle was lovely!"
"She was named for a mushroom, she smelled like mushrooms and in the pictures on your phone she looked like a mushroom. You even sat there and said that she grew on you."
"Yeah, well, maybe she was a mistake."
"Can you name me one that wasn't a mistake?"
The silence that ensued was too intense for Ben not to be actually thinking his way through his list of girlfriends, and while Bill was grinning broadly the henchman found it all quite uncomfortable. They shifted the weight of the rucksack slightly, hoisting it further up their back towards their shoulders.
The black market was literally black: the stalls were all done in shades of black and midnight blue, ebon cloths covered things that were available for sale if you asked the right questions, the stallholders all dressed like they were extras from Assassin's Creed, and the paths were paved with a dark, light-absorbing stone. There were probably shadows somewhere, but it was impossible to distinguish them from the surroundings, and they'd probably turn out to be someone's stock when you did find them.
"Agnostia?" said Ben. "Oh, turn left here, George said he was hanging out by the souk these days."
"She gave you weevils," said Bill. "Six days in the hospital and that lady-doctor asking you repeatedly if you were trying to have sex with trees because that was the only way she could conceive you could have got an infestation."
"Oh yeah, her wooden legs," said Ben. "She had attachment points for three you know."
"Well at least I know what you saw in her at last. The only souk down here is Thorhilde's you know?"
"Yeah, George said he liked the Nordic theme they had going on. The lady-doctor wasn't a mistake."
"She tried to remove your kidneys and sell them. How is that 'not a mistake'?"
"Oh yes! I remember. What happened to her?"
"Agnostia didn't know you'd broken up with her and came in just after you'd drunk the drugged coffee. You slept through the catfight and I had to pull you from the house when one of them set it on fire."
"We got the ice-box full of kidneys from that didn't we?"
"Made a tidy profit, which is a change for your dating."
"Look, here's George. Right henchling, let's see how good your haggling skills are. George has been fencing stuff in the black market for nearly thirty years, so you've got a bit of a challenge ahead of you."
Greg - I don't know what you're talking about... *ahem*. Moving on!
ReplyDeleteAh, Ben and Bill :D Great descriptions, as usual, and I'm left feeling sorry for the poor henchling, once again.
Also: Ben has quite the dating history.