A contraption, a loan shark and a scandal? This is turning out to be an ominous week in terms of prompts!
The scandal Professor Badonkadonk took the steps to the podium of the Great Hall slowly, taking care to make sure that each foot was set carefully down before lifting the previous one. Her face had the greyish pallor of a zombie with poor make-up skills and her robes, usually iridescent and glittering, reflective of her near-permanent good humour, were today steel-grey and clinging to her like spandex. The other teachers sat in rigid silence, each head bowed and staring at the plates and flatware on the table as though they thought it might scurry off and hide at any moment. Overhead the ceiling, normally enchanted to show the weather outside, was a mass of swirling grey clouds in which lightning periodically flickered. There was a sense of foreboding throughout the hall, and the students were nearly silent, waiting for what could only be dreadful news. "It's the Demented," muttered the surviving Parathi twin. "They must have taken over the school. They're going to make us all learn knitting and eat weird, hard toffees." Hermione snorted, but softly. "The teachers can handle the Demented," she whispered. "I bet the school's just run out of money and they're going to have to hold a fete in order to buy potion ingredients to last to the end of term." "What's a fete?" asked Harry, while Ron carefully wiped the drool off his chin. "Never mind," whispered Hermione. "Professor Badonkadonk is about to speak."
"Children, students, members of staff...," Professor Badonkadonk's gaze ran across the assembled masses. "and Professor Several Snipe, whose general species I cannot identify, it falls to me as Apprentice Head of this school to tell you that there has been a Scandal." The students gasped almost as though cued. "The Headmaster, Professor Doctor Bumblebuzz, has... has been revealed by the Ministry of Magic to be a fraud." There was another gasp, except from Hermione who was muttering "I knew it!" and scrabbling furiously in her bag for something. "He is, in fact, the near-legendary con-artist Damien Bubblebutt, also known as David Scuttlebutt, Constantine Dribblefoot,...." The list of names went on for a while, and the assembled teachers looked more and more miserable as each name was called. Hermione found what she was looking for in the middle of the recitation: a notebook sealed with a Shrieking Charm and three death-curses of increasing strength. "Open this," she said to Ron, holding the book out. He recoiled as though burned. "Can't blame me for trying," said Hermione. She waved her wand several times, undoing enchantments and spells, and opened the book to the middle. "See," she said. "I knew it didn't add up: the things we're allowed to do here would be grounds for arrest in every country in the world, and for the death penalty in 68% of them. Look at Harry -- what's happened to him is a criminal litany waiting to be read." "You did most of it!" hissed Ron with violence. "That doesn't make it legal," said Hermione. "I just did it because I could." "...and then Bumblebuzz was caught in bed with 180 students...," said Professor Badonkadonk in the tones of someone who had a lot more like that to say. "He called it art." "That's because he's polymorph-potioned them all to look like Ronnie Weasel," said Hermione. She saw the look on Ron's face. "What? No-one told you yet?"
Greg - I seem to be giving my prompts themes a lot lately. I'd like to say I've got a plan in mind when I do that, but usually I don't :)
Ah, this is a delightfully horrific entry in your Potter world. Nicely done, as always :D
Morganna - is this the patient that has escaped into the overgrown shrubs that's gone missing? Because if so... this makes me incredibly happy to see that tale continuing in that way :D
4 comments:
A contraption, a loan shark and a scandal? This is turning out to be an ominous week in terms of prompts!
The scandal
Professor Badonkadonk took the steps to the podium of the Great Hall slowly, taking care to make sure that each foot was set carefully down before lifting the previous one. Her face had the greyish pallor of a zombie with poor make-up skills and her robes, usually iridescent and glittering, reflective of her near-permanent good humour, were today steel-grey and clinging to her like spandex. The other teachers sat in rigid silence, each head bowed and staring at the plates and flatware on the table as though they thought it might scurry off and hide at any moment. Overhead the ceiling, normally enchanted to show the weather outside, was a mass of swirling grey clouds in which lightning periodically flickered. There was a sense of foreboding throughout the hall, and the students were nearly silent, waiting for what could only be dreadful news.
"It's the Demented," muttered the surviving Parathi twin. "They must have taken over the school. They're going to make us all learn knitting and eat weird, hard toffees."
Hermione snorted, but softly. "The teachers can handle the Demented," she whispered. "I bet the school's just run out of money and they're going to have to hold a fete in order to buy potion ingredients to last to the end of term."
"What's a fete?" asked Harry, while Ron carefully wiped the drool off his chin.
"Never mind," whispered Hermione. "Professor Badonkadonk is about to speak."
"Children, students, members of staff...," Professor Badonkadonk's gaze ran across the assembled masses. "and Professor Several Snipe, whose general species I cannot identify, it falls to me as Apprentice Head of this school to tell you that there has been a Scandal."
The students gasped almost as though cued.
"The Headmaster, Professor Doctor Bumblebuzz, has... has been revealed by the Ministry of Magic to be a fraud."
There was another gasp, except from Hermione who was muttering "I knew it!" and scrabbling furiously in her bag for something.
"He is, in fact, the near-legendary con-artist Damien Bubblebutt, also known as David Scuttlebutt, Constantine Dribblefoot,...." The list of names went on for a while, and the assembled teachers looked more and more miserable as each name was called. Hermione found what she was looking for in the middle of the recitation: a notebook sealed with a Shrieking Charm and three death-curses of increasing strength.
"Open this," she said to Ron, holding the book out. He recoiled as though burned. "Can't blame me for trying," said Hermione. She waved her wand several times, undoing enchantments and spells, and opened the book to the middle.
"See," she said. "I knew it didn't add up: the things we're allowed to do here would be grounds for arrest in every country in the world, and for the death penalty in 68% of them. Look at Harry -- what's happened to him is a criminal litany waiting to be read."
"You did most of it!" hissed Ron with violence.
"That doesn't make it legal," said Hermione. "I just did it because I could."
"...and then Bumblebuzz was caught in bed with 180 students...," said Professor Badonkadonk in the tones of someone who had a lot more like that to say. "He called it art."
"That's because he's polymorph-potioned them all to look like Ronnie Weasel," said Hermione. She saw the look on Ron's face. "What? No-one told you yet?"
What do you mean, you
Lost my mother? You can't just
Misplace my mother!
I'm sorry, m'am, we
Haven't been able to find
Her, just her walker.
Greg - I seem to be giving my prompts themes a lot lately. I'd like to say I've got a plan in mind when I do that, but usually I don't :)
Ah, this is a delightfully horrific entry in your Potter world. Nicely done, as always :D
Morganna - is this the patient that has escaped into the overgrown shrubs that's gone missing? Because if so... this makes me incredibly happy to see that tale continuing in that way :D
This is the escaped patient!
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