Sunday May 21st, 2017

The exercise:

Write about something or someone that is: unique.

Met a lovely couple (and their three dogs) at Cottonwood Beach this morning. They're not the first locals I've come across who don't think our local bylaws apply to them, but there were certainly the most unpleasant I've talked to.

I will only say two things about it. One, I am glad that I am not a bylaw enforcement officer. And two... whatever the enforcement officers get paid, it is not enough.

It was a hot one today. Combined with the long weekend crowds it felt like a summer preview.


I am a beautiful, one of a kind butterfly, to whom the rules clearly do not apply. They are for that lady, and that child, and most definitely that guy. But all these restrictions and limitations are not for I.

I am the exception to the rule, the epitome of cool, the smartest kid in school. Save your legislative guidance for all these other fools.

This life is mine, I am the pearl before these swine. I was created by a divine design, only entering this world when all of the stars were perfectly aligned.

I... you're writing me a ticket?

How much is the fine?!?

Saturday May 20th, 2017

The exercise:

Write a four line poem that is not only a poem, but is also a: drinking song.

Town is very busy, what with the long weekend and all. Definitely kept me on my toes. Opening the washrooms tomorrow morning could be interesting but hopefully everyone behaves themselves out there tonight.

Found a broken toilet paper dispenser in one of the washrooms this morning. With the full crew not back until Tuesday I felt like I should at least try to replace it myself. It took a few trips and a few different screwdrivers but I did manage it in the end.

Felt like a king.

A handyman king.

Or something.

Whatever, it felt good.

I should get some sleep now.


Pour me another, lads -
The last one surely missed its mark!
Pour some for yourselves, lads -
Tonight we're drinking in the park!

Friday May 19th, 2017

The exercise:

Write four lines of prose about: my new car.

Kat took a solo trip to Penticton this morning to run some errands and have an appointment, so I had the boys to myself. The weather was perfectly agreeable, so we went to the park for a few hours. Max bumped into a friend, but also made a couple new friends, which was great to see.

They played hide and seek for a long time which, if you've never seen three four year old boys play it, is an absolute treat to watch. Max showed off by counting to thirty, the boys either giggled or called out 'I'm over/up/down here' if it was taking too long for the seeker to find them, and everybody had a blast.

Back to work tomorrow for four days, then I only get two days off, then it's on for four more days since I traded a couple days with Tammy. Thankfully at the end of that stretch I get six days off to make up for it.

Assuming I survive working eight out of the next ten days.


Hey, check out my fresh new ride! I think I'm gonna get some sexy flames put on the side! I'll be on the prowl, I'll be on the attack!

Hey... who put those kid seats in the back?

Thursday May 18th, 2017

The exercise:

Write about: the bomb.

Went grocery shopping with Miles this morning after we dropped Max off at playschool. While he was having fun making a Cat in the Hat hat, Miles enjoyed driving around the store in the grocery cart and I was able to get all the shopping done.

Worked out nicely.

This afternoon while Miles napped, Max came with me to my chiropractor appointment and then we squeezed in a bit of park time before coming home to take care of Miles so that Kat could finish up with some work she was doing.

Before dinner, and a little bit after, Max and I attempted to clean up and organize his room. It was not easy with Miles 'helping', but we did get rid of three cardboard boxes he'd been hoarding in there (two of them on the very large side of things). It looks loads better now, but we still have his craft box, his toy box, and his bookshelf to tackle.

Hopefully tomorrow.


They say that I am a
Ticking time bomb.
That I am only safe when
I remain calm.
I am offended by this.
I don't like this claim at all.
Can't handle my heat?
Can't wait until my fall?
Christ, y'all make me sick.
Keep your distance if you're scared.
Keep running but if you cross me
Know that you won't be spared.

Wednesday May 17th, 2017

The exercise:

Write about: the knock-off.

Finally got around to cleaning out the car and giving it an oil change this afternoon. I'd been ignoring the automated reminder for quite some time now, but between the weather and not having much free time it just wasn't happening. Glad to have that done now though.

Also went for a family walk at Haynes Point this morning. It's been a while since we made it out there and thankfully the lake levels weren't too high to get in the way too much. Though there was a rather large puddle that we couldn't get around that blocked a section of the boardwalk.

Oh, and we got some more seeds into the garden this afternoon as well. Productive day.


She wanted a thousand dollars
For her prized pure bred dog,
But upon closer inspection
It was just a hairy log

Tuesday May 16th, 2017

The exercise:

Write two haiku about things that are: free.

Took Max to get his allergies tested this afternoon. The only things he reacted really strongly to were dairy (no surprise there) and corn (okay, that was unexpected). He showed some sensitivity toward gluten (better than expected), coconut (what?), peanuts (sure, why not), sunflower (yeah, okay), and oranges (see coconut above).

The dietician did some work on the dairy and corn and we're going to keep him off all of the above for the next three weeks. Then we'll take him in for a follow up appointment to see how his body is doing.

Overall it went pretty well and Max was his charming, silly, funny self and got along great with the dietician.

We had to rush a bit to get back to Osoyoos afterward for my chiropractor appointment but we managed to not be excessively late. She said this time was the most my rib moved of any of the adjustments she's done, which is good news.

And that I should expect to be pretty sore tomorrow as a result.



Love don't cost a thing?
You believe that and your love
won't stick around long...

*     *     *

You don't like my rules?
That they're unfair and unjust?
Then feel free to leave.

Monday May 15th, 2017

The exercise:

Write about: the raccoon.

Because I was just woken up by a raccoon knocking something over just outside our door on the deck. Took a while to get it to walk around front into the light, but I saw he or she was a pretty good size once he/she did.

Town Hall was about as bad as I figured it would be - much too big a job for the time allowed. I think next week I'll get even more done on Sunday and see how that works out.

I thought having my 'Monday' on Friday was bad. Apparently having my 'Friday' on Monday is much worse.

I quite regularly forgot what day it was throughout my shift. I had to stop myself from doing another four lines of prose prompt.

I think I am ready for my weekend now, thanks very much.


Masked bandit
In the night
Looking to see
What he might
Find around
The house -
He's much larger
Than a mouse!
I think I shall
Watch from here.
Uh, nothing
To do with fear.
Just, uh, I think
I like this view,
Because, um, it's like
Being at the zoo?
Yes, that's it,
That's quite right!
Especially at
This time of night...