Write something from the perspective of: the killer.
So today, just a couple days away from the conclusion of one of the coldest Aprils on record for this area, it hailed. While I was out bringing in wood for our fireplace. Which we're still using, as it hasn't yet been warm enough overnight for us not to use it.
But hey, the Canucks won game one of their second round series tonight! So that helps.
They deserved it. Every last one of them. If they didn't, I wouldn't have done it, right?
What, do you think I'm some sort of maniac? Far from it, my friend. Far from it. I simply administer justice wherever others are too weak, too scared to do so. I'm a hero, really. Maybe they'll put up a statue of me after I'm gone.
Take Shelly, for example. The way she flaunted herself all over town, tempting poor, innocent boys to stray from the Good path. It almost worked on you, didn't it? But I took care of her just in time. Don't worry, you don't have to thank me.
What was that? Stop mumbling, please. I find it highly aggravating. Besides, if I wanted to hear your thoughts on the matter I wouldn't have stuffed that gag in your mouth.