Friday May 10th, 2013

The exercise:

Write four lines of prose about: takeout.

Had a yard day today, managing to make a reasonable amount of progress on having a presentable yard. Back to the garden tomorrow, which should be the last Saturday I'm not at the market for quite some time.

In the meantime, we're preparing to have a plant sale here at our home the next couple of Tuesdays, and maybe even sell some greens too. The farming season is gathering momentum.

Mine:

"So that's two chicken burgers, one tossed salad, one large fries, and two medium Diet Cokes, all ready to go."

From his seat by the window Derek watched the elderly man pay for and collect his takeout bag before making his way slowly out the door. Overall it was a pretty good order; he would have preferred regular sodas, but he couldn't afford to be that picky.

Shifting in his seat he signaled to his partner Tommy, who was leaning against a shop across the street, letting him know that their dinner was ready to be taken.

5 Comments:

Greg said...

Is the yard work in preparation then for the plant sale? That sounds like it could be fun and interesting for you! You might not be at the market, but you're definitely still selling things :)
Your story is, I think, an interesting set-up. Those kids are asking for trouble, picking on an elderly man...

Mine:
The takeout was easy; Tommy ran at the elderly man waving his arms and wailing like he was soft in the head, and Derek simply snatched the bag almost unnoticed. Then they both broke for the exit, leaving the man stunned and clutching at his chest just outside the shop.
Then something – someone? – heavy slammed into Derek from the side and knocked him completely off his feet. As he slid on his face across the smooth concrete he saw an Alsatian take Tommy down too, face-first into the kerb.

MosesMalone said...

“Welcome to Burger King, may I take your order?” Brenda asked

A lot of laughing was coming through the headset so Brenda looked at Theresa and rolled her eyes. She whispered, “John Adams High class of sluts, table for 5.” They both giggled.

“Hello!!!!! Are you going to take our order, or what?” whined Tara - the driver of the slutmobile.

“Welcome to Burger King, may I take your order?” Brenda yelled as loudly and excitedly as she could.

“Ummm you don’t have to yell. We’re not deaf. I’m just blind. Hahaha. Get it! I’m driving and I’m blind!!!” Tara snorted with laughter and so did the car full of girls.

“Go ahead with your order.” Brenda said monotone.

“Yeah, get me 5 Big Macs.” Tara said while laughing.

“Would you like to supersize those?” Brenda asked.

“Is she serious?” “What an idiot.” “How did she get valedictorian?” “I can’t believe YOU actually know that word.” Spat out a few different girls as Brenda listened in on her earpiece.

“Yeah, sure.” Tara said confused.

“Wonderful, please drive up to window number 1 across the street at McDonalds. I’ll call your order in. Thanks for stopping in at Burger King. John Adams - Roar!!” Brenda said while annunciating every single syllable.

“Wait? Did she just beat us to the joke…” Trailed off one of the girls as the car drove away.

“I can’t believe you saved enough money working Burger King to pay your way through Yale?” sadly said Theresa.

“Well, not really. The grants are mostly taking care of that. This is just helping with my living expenses.” Said Brenda.

“Are you going to take Manager Mikes suggestion and work at the Burger King near campus” asked Theresa.

“Fuck no! I’m done serving takeout. I’m only eating it while I throw on my freshman 15.” Laughed Brenda.

Marc said...

Greg - eh, it's just in preparation for ignoring it in favor of the garden for the rest of the year :P

Oof, always watch out for protective dogs. Ouch, ouch, and ouch.

Mo - some good characterization here, with some fun dialogue to boot :)

David said...

Chinese takeout boxes littered the floor of apartment 2C. The Barber dodged the rancid lo mein and festering eggrolls, entering the bedroom where Mick lay against the headboard. One hole neatly dotted his forehead and two empty sockets stared out from where his eyes should be. The Raven had taken another one out before the Barber had the chance.

Marc said...

David - The Raven? A whole new world of possibilities has just opened up, hasn't it?

I am, just for the record, terribly pleased by this :)