Friday December 25th, 2015

The exercise:

Write four lines of prose about something that is: unwrapped.

Merry Christmas :)

Mine:

I'm not sure what happened. We'd all done our best to keep it under wraps. Maybe a protruding nail was the source of our misery, or perhaps a careless footstep.

All I know for certain is that when I glanced behind me I saw that the mummy had been unwrapped and... well, I haven't had a proper's night sleep in the twenty years that have passed since that fateful moment.

3 Comments:

Greg said...

I would call this succinct, I think: there's a strong suggestion that something much worse than an old, decayed skeleton being seen has happened, and that it's been a war of attrition too. I think, maybe, you could combine the first two lines into just one, which would free up one more line to shape the horror a little more. Nothing too overt, just something to indicate a little more about the twenty years. But it's only a suggestion :)

Greg said...

Unwrapped
It had been a good haul, and Kat had managed to fill three Partners in Rhymes branded rucksacks with wallets, scarves, handbags and watches while Cecil had been delivering dead-pan beat poetry on stage. But even so....
"Cecil," she said as they loaded up their 'tour' van and strapped themselves in, "that was definitely prose I heard from you there at the end." Cecil demurred as he put the van into gear and slowly reversed out into traffic, but Kat wasn't put off: "What I heard," she said frostily, "was definitely... un-rapped."

Marc said...

Greg - that's a solid idea, actually. I shall keep it in mind. Thanks!

Hah, clever take on the prompt. And a neat, tidy little snippet from your performing duo :)

I hope you had a good Christmas!