Wednesday January 4th, 2012

The exercise:

It's been a long time - let's make some more unfavorable comparisons.

Not inspired by anything other than me simply remembering we hadn't done that one in a while.

Starting to feel dangerously close to healthy again. Combine that with a rather pleasant 10 degree day and some good progress on writing projects and that was a pretty decent Wednesday.


Heads turned as the car slowly pulled into the garage. It was like watching a terminally ill smoker shuffle into his doctor's office for the first time in twenty years, expecting to be healed the day before they were set to pull the plug.

*     *     *

Mitchell swung a golf club as though it was a poisonous snake. That had been coated with skunk spray. And had just been informed that it was Mitchell's doing.

*     *     *

His cough sounds like the mating call of a deranged dingo.

*     *     *

She always dances as though an angry hive of bees have just been released under her dress.


Greg said...

Wow, it has been a long time for this prompt! Looking back over the previous posts, I see everyone's traditionally been very creative with these, so I guess I shall have to try hard today!
Glad to hear that you're on the mend and that the writing is progressing :)
I think I like your last one best, just for the hysterical mental picture I get!

Unfavourable comparisons

Making love to her was like drowning in quicksand.


Her looks were so unfortunate that at the speed-dating event she broke all the records for the shortest time for people standing up again after they'd sat down with her.


His paintings were so bad they even made blind people cry.


His skin was so greasy that when he moved to Florida his neighbours would get the urge to barbecue whenever he sun-bathed.

Cathryn Leigh said...

Yikes! I'm not so sure I can do these. I'm just such a naturally kind and thoughtful, never hurtful person (*snicker giggles*)

Unfavorable Comparisons

Hearing the children play was like listening to the Philharmonic Orchestra playing with discordant instruments.

Looking into her eyes was like gazing into a black abyss as you plummeted to your death.

Watching him run was like watching someone roll a bowl full of Jell-O down the street, complete with all the grim picked up from the inner city slum pavement.

~Bleck~ *giggles* :}

David said...

Now this is a tough one ... I liked your second one Marc, sounds like my golf game.
@Greg and Cathryn - like both of your last ones, although both gave me a queasy feeling.

My attempts are lame (how's that for an unfavorable comparison)

He swam with the grace of a beached whale.

The General led his troops into battle with all the sound and fury of a Liberace concert.

The meal was as flavorful as any a North Korean five star restaurant could offer.

After his boys gave up yet another touchdown, the coach knew that either his defense had stayed up too late or the zombie apocalypse was upon us.

morganna said...

This is all I could manage:
He giggled like a talking Elmo doll.

Nita said...

His ringtone shrieked with the sound of an angry 2yo.

A southern lady to the bitter end, her tea was an entire bag of sugar sweet and required an insulin injection to survive a glass of it.

The pain was like a rabid wolverine trying to claw its way out of his abdomen.

Aholiab said...

This is an unusual exercise for me, but a fun one...

Unfavorable comparisons

Jennifer glanced in the mirror at her long blond hair that spilled down her head like half-cooked spaghetti over which someone had spilled a cup of oil... probably 10W-30.

Fred tapped away at his keyboard with the accuracy of a shivering stock trader wearing mittens, moments after his wealthiest client Tasered him for converting all of his investments to Somalian shillings.

Marc said...

Greg - that first one puts quite the image in my mind... and that last one definitely made me smile :)

Elor - haha, great final comparison!

David - I don't think those were lame at all; in fact I thought the General one was great :D

Morganna - oh my, that would be unfortunate!

Nita - your last one made me wince and squirm a little. Nicely done!

Aholiab - those are both fantastic, I'm having trouble picking a fav! Probably the second :)

Audey said...

"You golf like tiger woods," I comment neutrally.
I stare at him.
"...You haven't seen any of his games recently, have you?"

Marc said...

Audey - haha, nice one :)