Monday August 3rd, 2015

The exercise:

Write about: the float.

Did some weeding in the garden this morning before running some errands in town after lunch. I was surprised at how busy everywhere still was - I'd really thought that all the tourists would have headed home from their long weekends by then.

More time in the garden tomorrow morning. Hoping for another cool day like today.

Mine:

"We're gonna win first prize for sure."

"Why, did you bribe someone?"

"What? Come on, man - just look at this float! How could it lose?"

"I'll admit the strippers will definitely appeal to the men in the audience..."

"Totally, right? But it's not like we forgot about the chicks!"

"What... oh. You were actually serious about hiring firefighters to pass out apple pie recipes?"

"Shirtless firefighters."

"Obviously. But I think you might be forgetting something."

"The kids? Man, screw them. They're not old enough to vote."

"To be fair, nobody is old enough to vote."

"What are you talking about?"

"There is no voting. There are no judges. There is no first place. That's not the point of this parade."

"... then who did I just pay-off to have our float go on last?"

"Couldn't tell ya."

2 Comments:

Greg said...

The tourists must like your town as much as you do! Never mind, come winter when you're working in the town hall maybe you can slip some new legislation in that requires all tourists to leave after 57.25 hours; tourists failing to abide by that rule will be sent out to local farms to work for free for a period equal to the duration of their overstay :)
Heh, that sounds like quite the float! Though I'm not sure what would happen in the event of a major fire with all those firemen out of uniform and carrying flammable materials! I am also quite curious as to who our ambitious float-organiser paid off for a position in the parade... you should tell us!

The float
"Witch!" chorused the children as Annabel struggled to the surface of the swimming pool. "Burn her!"
Catherine, the new P.E. teacher, looked rather taken aback, and Coach Spokane spared her a thin-lipped smile. "The families round here are very traditional," she said. "If she floats she's a witch, and witches are dealt with... swiftly."
"But we're trying to teach them to swim!"
"And she's floating. So she's a witch."
"But if she didn't float she'd drown!"
"So she's dead either way, but drowning's got to be better than burning."
"But... but... I can't believe this."
Coach Spokane looked almost apologetic as she pushed Catherine into the pool. Catherine shot back to the surface like a guided missile gasping for breath and trying to clear water from her eyes.
"Witch! Burn her!" chorused the children.
"There," said Coach Spokane, almost gently. "Now you can keep Annabel company."

Marc said...

Greg - that sounds like an excellent plan. Then all I'd have to do is make sure none of the tourists were aware of the new legislation...

Poor Catherine... but perhaps she should have researched her new position a little more thoroughly before accepting it? :P