Thursday October 24th, 2013

The exercise:

Write about: the sting.

Took a family trip up to Penticton today to run some errands. Managed to get a few groceries, some t-shirts for myself, and a nice long car nap for Max on the way back home.

Something interesting is happening tomorrow. I shall talk about it, at length I imagine, in Friday's post.

Apologies for the tease; I wasn't going to mention it at all, but apparently I'm too excited to keep it entirely to myself.

Mine:

The unmarked police car lurked in the shadow of an oak tree that was in the process of slowly losing its autumn leaves. Though their superiors would not have been pleased to know it, the officers inside had rolled each of the vehicle's four windows all the way down. It may have undermined the dark tint that would have helped to conceal their presence, but it also allowed the stench to escape.

The smell of sugary donuts and grease soaked fries could almost be seen wafting out of the vehicle.

Neither officer was responsible for the unpleasant atmosphere. That honor would fall squarely on the shoulders of Myers and Louis, the officers who had preceded them on surveillance duty. They had been told to avoid their favorite snacks, in very clear terms, before the investigation had even begun.

They had been warned. Foolishly, they chose to ignore those warnings.

Because they were not only preceding the current officers' shift... Myers and Louis would also be following it.

"Think that's enough honey on the brake pedal?"

"Seems good to me... but I'm no expert. We'll just have to see what the bees think."

4 Comments:

Greg said...

You're almost caught up on the comments! Just a few more and you'll be there – and then I'm sure you'll overtake us and provide responses before we've even had time to write new comments for you :)
I'm looking forward to hearing about this event then! It must be exciting if you can't resist telling us that something is coming. Or maybe one of my little Ilmatu from my horror story has just found where you live?
NaNoWriMo is coming up, I suppose I could write a horror story for it. I've got just a few days to plan it too... we'll see!
I like your policemen, and their approach to their work^H^H^H^Hcolleagues :) It's a lovely scene, well set and delivered. Great work!

The sting
Just a pinprick, a momentary pain that flares up like the brightest light, dazzling and confusing, then fades away again. Then the feather-light crawl of tiny, spindly legs over your arm, brushing past the delicate, upstanding hairs and tracking over the goosebumps. Finding a new spot. Finding a new place. Then a repeat of the pinprick, a repeat of the pain.
A buzz, brief, abbreviated. The light landing of something small, something crushable, something insignificant back on an arm, on a leg, on a back. The sting of anger as it lets you know it didn't like being dislodged. A second sting, then a third, and a fourth....
And it's working its way up to your eyes.

David said...

The bee fell lay on the ground, its lifeless body waiting to be crunched under Dale's work boot. The soul formerly known as the bee looked down from heaven, well, at least the gates of heaven. St. Peter made him watch and rewatch the replay of the sting from every conceivable angle. They needed inconclusive evidence or else the ruling could not be overturned. Eventually, after many interminable minutes and not enough commercial breaks, St. Peter turned on his microphone, "....the ruling on the field stands...unsportsmanlike conduct..." The bee's soul hung his head low, one act of aggression would cost him. The bee would not be reincarnated as an ant, but a banana slug. Karma is a bitch.

Aholiab said...

a scene from the universe of "Invisible"

The Sting

Jenkins stepped into the elevator and nodded to the corner where he saw the wristband floating in mid-air.

“So what do you think of the conference so far?” he asked while pushing the button for the lobby.

There was a pause, then the quiet response, “It is my first time in the world of the Visibles, so it is a little overwhelming. The technology here is more than I could have imagined.”

“Yeah, I can understand a little bit. This is my first time to be in contact with so many Invisibles. I’m afraid that will be the most memorable thing I take away from the conference.” He grinned and continued, “But don’t tell my boss that! He thinks I’ll be an expert at Project Analysis and Scheduling after this.”

The elevator stopped at the main floor. “Would you like to join me for a drink? It’s happy hour for another couple of hours.”

He could almost hear the man considering the strangeness of an hour lasting for another two hours. The answer surprised him though.

“I have never had alcoholic drinks before, but I would be pleased to share some with you.”

When the waitress brought their first shots of whiskey, Jenkins showed his companion how to toss back the drink in a single swallow.

With a choke the man gasped out, “How can you stand that? It’s burning my entire throat!”

Jenkins smiled, and nodded, “Ah, yes, the sting is the best part. Let’s have another, only maybe something a bit smoother.”

Marc said...

Greg - hmm, pre-responses sound like a fantastic idea to me. I shall get to work on those... whenever I finally manage to catch up.

You writing a Nanowrimo horror story would please me greatly. I'm not sure I'd get any sleep all month (if you posted it as you went), but some strange part of me would be pleased.

Yeesh, that is very well described. Makes me kinda squirmy just reading it.

David - hah, that's rather brilliant. I particularly enjoyed the reference to the commercial breaks.

Aholiab - lord a mercy, I am so totally hooked on this world of yours. So many interesting interactions and surprising details to play with.