The exercise:
Today we'll try out a new prompt, as suggested by Greg: completions.
I'll give you the first stanza of a poem and you get to finish it as you wish. If you'd like to switch over to prose in order to bring it to some sort of conclusion, that's totally fine as well.
It's good to have Kat home again.
Mine:
It's been too long
That you've been gone;
Will you ever return,
Or have these bridges burned?
Has the river risen too high,
Have we said our final goodbye?
8 comments:
Hmm, I wasn't expecting you to use that prompt idea quite so... well, promptly :) Still, you've given us a pretty good first stanza, so let's see where it takes me!
(PS Welcome back, Kat!)
Cont'd
I see you standing on the shore,
I read your lips, and you implore
Me not to leave, not let you go,
Though bridges burn and the river grow.
I could not leave you if I tried,
For all we stand on different sides.
It's been too long,
That you've been gone;
And now you're here,
There is no fear.
I'll walk on water and cross this tide,
Until we're standing side by side.
It is time for us to part
The day has come, sweetheart,
Mornings are cold, the frost is on the lawn
I'll see you on the ground, tomorrow dawn,
My heart, my yellow leaf.
--------------------
Entitled Love Letter from a Tree in Autumn
And being further inspired, I turned it into another poem and posted it on my blog: http://lizbethsgarden.wordpress.com/2011/07/25/a-love-letter-from-a-tree-in-autumn/
I tried to row through the flood,
to where calm waters waited,
I arrived and found
that you were belated.
So I resolved to take off,
as the current was too much.
I took a small inlet as far as I dared.
I found a brave stream,
where the torrents couldn't follow.
You stared from your boat,
contempt dueling regret.
But I sail on down it, to greater white shores.
Ok, why I am writing in rhyme so much today?! That first stanza pattern was not on purpose. I actually prefer free verse, but I have been writing a lot of music and lyrics lately, maybe that's why. :P
This poem turned out very freudian. By that I mean it captures a lot of emotion I actually felt after a break up. It's title is, "The Second Time I met Pamela Anderson." Denin- Rhyme is powerful instinctually, all the poetic devices hit on an unconscious level but rhyme and rhythm, in my opinion, are the most powerful.
It's been too long
That you've been gone;
Will you ever return,
Or have these bridges burned?
Has the river risen too high,
Have we said our final goodbye?
You left so fast
Running from our past;
Is my face so hurtful,
That you can’t see its mirthful?
Is your heart still shattered into bits,
Realize I’m the puzzle piece that fits.
We can try again
Start by being friends.
Will you give me a last chance,
My lady may I have this dance?
Would it kill you just to see me,
When I am your one and only?
God you’re a bitch
Like a pesky itch.
Are you fucking mental,
Do you eat anything but lentils?
Why do I try to ignite the flames of love,
When you are just my favorite drug?
Your light and mine,
Hardly ever together.
Moon and sunshine,
Apart in the weather.
I wish to see you,
To see your face.
Again in this blue
Sky, if I have to chase.
Come to me, love,
Together again.
We shall meet above,
Moon and sun, yin and yang.
Greg - eh, it was getting late and I couldn't think of a prompt on my own. Thanks for the save :)
Really liked your first stanza, especially the final two lines.
Morganna - beautiful.
Denin - subconscious rhyming is the best kind :)
I like the story you weaved through your completion, very nicely done.
Aaron - 'Realize I'm the puzzle piece that fits' is a great line.
Andrew - great completion! A lot of great lines, I can't pick a favorite.
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