Monday November 16th, 2009

The exercise:

All done writing for today, taking the night off.

NaNo Word Count: 33,259
NaNo Target: 26,669

Your prompt today: the big reveal.

And yes, the prompt is a reference to what's going on in the novel. And no, I'm not saying anything more than that.

Mine:

The man donned his top hat
And picked up his black cane;
With a nod to his cat,
He strode onto the stage.

The large crowd cheered wildly,
For he was the big star,
And I stood by idly,
Set to reveal his flaw.

He was blind for certain
To the coming trouble.
I pulled back the curtain
To show his twin brother.

I yelled from the rafters,
"Let's see you vanish now!"
And to roars of laughter,
To earth his star fell down.

4 comments:

Greg said...

Ah, a night off, that sounds nice! Looks like you made more than the daily target in words though, so I think you deserve it.
A big reveal? Your novel sounds more and more exciting!
And the poem is excellent, it's got a great flow and a very neat little twist there at the end. That said, and I know I'm being picky, the very last line feels a little weak. I think I'd probably have written the line straight "His star fell down to earth." as you've only been half-rhyming the second and last lines anyway.

The big reveal

Mother always kept secrets,
From us, from father, from the family,
And even from herself.
Sometimes, when she was sleeping,
We'd hear her mutter things,
Strange, dark words in foreign tongues
That she'd swear blind she didn't know
When she woke up again.
When the big reveal came
When at last the stars were all aligned,
Mother changed into something else,
An entity from beyond the stars,
As massive as a mammoth and scaly like a snake,
Tentacles that twisted and snaked about,
Blindly seeking things to eat,
And things to break.
And we were not surprised.

Monica Manning said...

Not my best work, granted, but it's what came to mind ...


The Big Reveal

On this day, the sheep took vows, promising to cherish the lamb to the end of time. The lamb, shy and nervous, trembled as she returned the pledge. All the animals in the barnyard rejoiced at the handfasting, celebrated at the feast.

Now joined for eternity, the sheep began to direct the lamb—felt it was his privilege. The lamb, afraid for herself and her young, allowed the herding. The hens began to cluck ‘poor lamb’, and the horses nay nayed. But the lamb listened not and kept her head bowed.

The dog watched from afar, growing more angry each day, until he finally confronted the sheep. As the dog barked and the sheep bleeted, the other animals gathered to watch the scene unfold. The dog nipped at the sheep, who kicked back in return. The dog ran around the sheep who moved evasively until—to his surprise—he was backed against the barn door.

The sheep, trapped with no means of escape, revealed himself as the wolf he was. The animals watched in shock as the glistening wool slipped away to expose the snarling beast underneath.

Protecting the beloved lamb, the animals approached the wolf, heads lowered, ready for war. The wolf, realizing he was outnumbered, loped away, never to return.

Marc said...

Greg - I knew you wouldn't like that last line! Haha, I suppose your version would have worked better but it didn't even occur to me :)

And your reveal was much more dramatic than mine, unsurprised family and all :D

Monica - maybe not your best, but still better than most :)

I liked that the wolf didn't just settle for eating the lamb, he took the time to boss her around first. :D

Mulled Vine said...

It is time for the big reveal, time to come out and declare to the world who and what I really am. No more pretences, no more facades, no more fear. What is the worst that can happen? Rejection by others is surely not worse than rejecting myself? It is time to be true to my nature, come hell or high water. Here it is:

I am just, ever so slightly, nuts.